Why can't people be true to me and tell me what the reality is
I am surrounded by manipulation, politics and bitching
Who really are true and who fake
I have really lost a way to analyse them
When I stand at one end and look at them they all look so very same
I don't know whom to trust and which words to I really belong to
I am honest than why don't I get back same too
Who really is worth a trust, a word of love, a word of care
Who would be my locker of secrets without any selfish motives and plays
Liar's stay away from me please do not play with my heart
Because I cannot hurt you I never say why or say stop and just don't lie
I am not able to judge you unless I fall by
Get bruises and pain and blood shed by
Unless I am not left with tears in my eyes and no answers to my whys
Everytime you hurt and quietly stand by
I decide neither get hurt nor cry
I do not expect things from you
but don't always break me and walk away with a smile...

Going to sleep early as I don't wanna live,
Don't want to ever see sunrise nor the night,
wanted to live my life not lead it with rules
Things are not moving and I do not want to move,
Close my eyes and feel the hurt within
change the breath and die just soon
not feeling pain anymore nor any pinch
its all ended as I just do not breath..
Do not feel the breeze nor hear birds singing
what I just see is all the mess I did
Never to assume life as free..
had forgotten that had to pay to live..
I do not have fortune and no more love left in me..
all I can see is a silent exit...

Loosing my mind, seeing the world of denial
Blossoming flower on the road to die
Ring of gold loosing its shine
The evening sunset never let the sun rise
Waiting to smell the bright sunlight
feel the fresh air and the cold dark night...

Moment passes by,walk away the clouds
I see green in my eyes, and lead to countryside
Beautiful farms and beautiful life makes me
all feel I am once again loosing my mind
not seeing the world of denial but seeing
the other side of life....

Travel down roads, walk down the slopes
I see brown in my eyes and lead to the town side
Ugly traffic and ugly crowd, no beautiful life
but atrocious side of life and all it makes me feel
I am loosing my mind, seeing the world of denial...
Blossoming flower on the road to die
Ring of gold loosing its shine
The evening sunset never let the sun rise
Waiting to smell the bright sunlight
feel the fresh air and the cold dark night...

Strangers are when we meet
Friends are when we speak
span of time never defined
as the time passed we build trust
the faith in eachother that could never break
someday lighting had to strike
burn the thread of trust and take us apart
what we found were the ashes on ground
Strangers again when we part
friends still when speak about eachother but not with eachother..

Sky is dark, I neither see moon nor the stars
has my vision become blurr or have i lost the sight
I dont see you near nor i see you far
I am here standing on top of the hill
Looking up in the sky and I find sky is dark,I neither see moon nor the stars
Your eyes are path to heaven
the ultimate truth i seek
but how do I see
has my vision become blurr or have i lost my sight....

The island of truth
the sea of lie
the world around me is hard and wild
stars shine high, never come closeby
breeze touch ears and just pass by
like a silent weed in the farm
feel like its time....

I always said I don't expect,
Maybe I was wrong..
I get hurt when you don't do something,
I get hurt when you don't say something,
I get hurt because I expect..
I never guessed and you never saw..
But I did expect and I was wrong..
It increased confusion,
It increased complication..
Is it the end of something or the start..
Where did I begin
Where do I end
I have decided not to go ahead
I have decided not to worry
I have decided not to say
I have decided not to feel
I have decided not to wait
I have decided not to stop
Because all of it means just nothing...

Historical facts...

Here I am with some historical fact about a place which I guess lot of people don't know about. This place is known as "Tarnetar".

Tarnetar is located on the way from Rajkot to a village called "Thangad" in Gujarat. Though Tarnetar has been very famous historical spot of India also covered by Discovery channel very few of us are aware about this place.

Tarnetar is known for one of the biggest fest that takes place in India. People from all around the world come to visit this place during the festival.

Tarnetar is a Lord Shiva temple. India has three biggest Shiva temple and this place is the second biggest.

Tarnetar carries the most prestigious historical memory that India and the world has ever known. Everyone knows about "Mahabharat". We know the story. We know that it happened somewhere on our motherland India. But do we know where?

Tarnetar is that one of those very few blessed lands of India. It is said that during Mahabharat Druapadi and paanch (five) Pandavas had stayed there during their escape. It is also said that the cart Wheel of Pandavas is still at this place kept safely.

It just makes me feel so proud that I visited this place. Thangad is where my ancestral house is located. Have been visiting the village since childhood but never landed up visiting this historical place.

The pond around the temple is blessed by river Ganga. During the fest once during those few days Ganga appears there. The change seen in the water is magnificent. Regular color of the water is green and when Ganga appears, water looks milky white and and there are bubbles in the water. And all do not get to see this. Very lucky few get to see it. During regular days you will mostly find turtles all around the pond.

This place is so quite and beautiful that once you go there you wouldn't want to move from that place for hours. It just takes you back to those old days and makes one imagine what must have been the situation than, what it must have looked like...

It is a very ordinary looking place but with great historical background to it but no one much visits there. I really do not know why expect during the fest.

The architecture is just brilliant and mind blowing and trust me all hand work.

Trust me worth a visit is what I call this place. Go there and talk to the Brahmin present there he will narrate the whole story and background of this place. Dint get too much of time to sit there and gather information as I had to head to my village. But definitely my next visit to this place is due and would be there soon.....

First....

Pleasant was the night when I first received your friend request
First time you approached and you made me smile
What else could I ask for?
Being a best friend was just the agenda..
Remains a mystery how our hearts met...
falling in love with you was so much soon
like I felt I was waiting for you,
we had times when our paths crossed
but we never gazed into each others eyes..
maybe we were destined to meet this way..
so we never part and we have nothing else to worry about in our hearts..
first time I met you and I was sure that you are the only one in my life...
there was so much of comfort that I shared with you..
as if I knew you for ages and hadn't just met you...
I felt like I was complete when you first held my hand...
even today I get goosebumps when I think of our first meet..
magic of you is all over me and let it be forever
as it makes me HAPPY !!

I walked down few miles across the streets
where I found little peace,
Wondering soul and wandering thoughts
found a bench to sit down and know
to know the truth of today
does life take us somewhere
OR
do we take life with us
Got up and I walked few miles ahead across the streets
where I found a book store to peep
wandering thoughts finally found place of answer
ran through the books and more books
Left the store and I walked few miles ahead across the streets

Beautiful song..loved its lyrics..

When I look back
On everything I have done
I know you must have cried
A river of tears,
but, you were there
when I was feeling low
To walk me through my darkest fears

so when the sun goes down
And those nights grow colder,
I will be there
Looking over your shoulder

And deeper the love
The stronger the emotion,
And the stronger the love
The deeper the devotion

There were times
I almost let you go
When I thought I needed to breakfree,
But you were there
To whisper in my ears
why don't you share your dreams with me

So when the sun goes down
And the those nights are growing colder
I will be there
Looking over your shoulder

And the deeper the love
The stronger the emotion,
And the stronger the love
The deeper the devotion

I don't mind, what you are doing to me
I don't mind, because you are all I can see
I don't mind, baby, you mean the world to me

When the sun goes down
And those nights are growing colder
I will be there
Looking over your shoulder, baby, baby, baby

So, when the sun goes down
And those nights are growing colder
I will be there
Looking over your shoulder

Because the deeper the love
The stronger the emotion
And stronger the love
The deeper the devotion

I never gona let you go,
In my heart I know
I really love you, I love you
Oh baby, I really love you........

It was then when all was good,
It was then when I felt your need,
to be with you was more than just a necessity
It was then when all was good,
It was then when I felt you so close,
to be on call with you was the only wish for the day
It was then when all was good,
It was then when I felt you were just a little more than a friend to me,
to be the only one in your life was my dream
It was then I loved searching you,
It was then when finding you was the biggest pleasure,
to be around you for all the available time brought smile on my face
It was then when I felt like sharing bench with you,
It was then when I felt wish I could get closer to you,
to be the one and only one for you
It was then when you came infront of me made me shiver,
It was then I felt something new in your breath,
to be able to hear every heartbeat of you
It was then when you spoke to me,
It was then when I found myself lost somewhere,
to be able to get touched with every word that I heard from you,
It was then when everytime you spoke,
It was then when I closed my eyes to feel you near,
to be able to feel the closeness of you
It was then when that day arrived,
It was then I decided to quite,
to be able to chose wrong path
It was then when every look of you got tears in my eyes,
It was then when life became so difficult,
to be away was a wrong decision

then,

came this day after so many years,
when i found you right once again here,
It was then when I felt wish I had said,
It was then when I felt why did I just let you go like that,
to be able to find answer to all is impossible
It is when I learnt how wrong I was,
It was then I wanted to see you so soon,
to be able to make it up for you
It was then I felt I should have valued the time,
It was then I felt just a day is not enough,
to be able to live all lost years
waiting for the moment
waiting for the day
waiting to hear the sound of you
waiting to know everything that i dint know
waiting to say what I should have long back...
waiting to be with you just without any expectation..
waiting for you...as always....

Looking at you in your eyes...
Felt like you touched my soul....
Walking with you , looking at the sky....
Finding the world getting larger and high....
Hand in hand and the silence around....
makes me feel something new in the air....
Conflict of mind and of heart...
Trying to find answers to why....
Looking at you in your eyes...
Felt like you touched my soul....

Our life has control over us as a soul. We are always in search of peace, the surrounding which we like, people whom we like and so on and so forth.
We lead our life in a particular way for years considering that no change is required but we are forced to change someday. The way we look at things, the way we think about someone, the way we feel for some,the way we talk, walk, write, read, our views about different topics. Life goes on but changes do not stop to happen.
What we do? we change with the situation and the moment. but our basic self still remains the same. Changes hurt us. They tear us apart when happen till we realise the why it was important.
Sometimes its too late, sometimes we are too early to bring a change.
I am surprised to see how a change influences our life.
The effects of certain change in our life remains for lifetime. The question about how, why etc. keep coming in our minds but no way to find answers. Some may be harmful too. But life goes on till it has to.
There is so much to talk about "change" but the thought somehow is not clear whats exactly do I intend to communicate.